You should not mess with me because:

1. I am the current owner of He-Man's sword and can call on the power of Grayskull any time.
2. I have a hotline to the White House and I only have to mention your name along with the words 'Al Qaeda' to get your house surrounded by flashing lights and helicopters within half an hour.
3. I possess a special spell whereby I can torment you in your dreams appearing as the Prince of Darkness every alternate night.
4. I own a pet tiger and can unleash him at any time upon unsuspecting enemies.
5. I am an expert in every form of martial arts and can level you on the ground merely by crying "Hi-yaa".
6. I can hypotize you merely by having you read my blog.
7. I can own your soul and body merely by spending $299.95 at the supermarket nearest my home and crying "Ahu Poha Pichamik!" three times while hopping on one foot.
8. I am in possession of a weather machine left behind by Cobra Commander and Destro after their last unsuccessful attempt at ruling the world and can cover your city in snow within minutes.
9. I can turn everything I touch into smelly cheese.
10. I can read your mind even before your thoughts are formed thereby being ahead of you by ten steps every time.

Hope you don't take this seriously. Just a little bit of original humour or at least an attempt at humour.